Crazy Bitch

My heart is hurting. Why oh why did I try to spend Memorial Day with “family”? When will I ever learn?

I went to a BBQ at my mother’s house. After she had cancer and suffered the loss of her husband we started to rebuild a relationship. But it’s fragile. There are subjects we still have to dance around carefully.

They call me the abrasive one. I’m the know-it-all. I think I’m superior to everyone else.

Right, of course I am.

They are the victims of my sharp tongue and I just say these things out of the blue.

Why do I care? Continue reading

I must say…

I must say I was a little embarrassed today when I made 2 confessions to my BFF. First, I have never given up anything for LENT. Not ever. I’m not particularly religious but I was raised in a Christian southern home where Bible thumping was mandated from time to time. But I don’t recall any of us ever having to choose something to give up. To be honest, I don’t think you should do it if you’re not gonna go all out and make a real sacrifice.

crossWhy say “I’m giving up cake” when you don’t even have cake all that often? That’s not hard to do. Now if you eat cake twice a day, I could see that as a sacrifice, but I think a lot of people pick something simple to give up and take the easy way out. That way, they can pretend they participated. I was pretty impressed by my friend. She has chosen to pray for people she doesn’t like for the next 40 days. Now that’s a challenge!

If I had to take that one on I’d have to start with my husband’s ex-wife. Now that I’ve done all the work of raising our daughter, she wants to come around and act as if I haven’t done the job right. Where was she 10 years ago when there was work to do? It has taken all my patience to keep from running over her with my car. I wonder if I could give up the ex-wife for Lent? I could use 40 days without her!

Maybe I could just give up the husband for 40 days! Now that would be interesting. Of course, instead of remembering the things Jesus gave up for me I might find myself getting into the kind of trouble that would land me in a confessional saying “Hail Mary’s” and begging the Priest to forgive me and I’m not even Catholic. I just have such a dirty mind I can’t seem to keep myself out of trouble. Continue reading

Steamy Dreaming

When I was 18 years old I fell in love with my boyfriend’s best friend, so, I did like any good girl would do. I ran for the hills and married the very next guy I dated. I’m not gonna lie, he’s crossed my mind many times over the years. I’ve got a pretty good marriage, and I’m not looking to change that, but a few years ago my old flame found me on Facebook and in a drunken chat one night he confessed his undying love for me.

I always thought he was feeling what I was feeling, but he’s this guy with unfaltering loyalty and integrity, so even though his best friend was a total douche bag running up my credit cards and cheating on me, he would never steal his best friend’s girl. He joined the Marines just to kill the temptation. He didn’t even tell me goodbye. We were on the verge of something, and then, he was gone.

We both moved on, got married, had kids, live relatively normal lives. There’s just one problem- some loves just don’t die. We’ve sort of taken to becoming BFF’s, which works just fine. We live hours apart, we don’t see each other. We text or chat or email, but we don’t hook up. We’ve had a few conversations about how life would have been so different if only….

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