I grew up hearing that in life, you have to be the bigger person. You have to be the better person. But life has taught me there is no truth to this. The truth is, you have to be the bigger bitch.
When you were in high school, who was the most popular girl? She wasn’t that sweet girl who gave her lunch tray to some kid who couldn’t afford one. She wasn’t that kind-hearted girl who volunteered at the old folks home. She was the biggest bitch in the hallway, and you know it.
Why does the biggest bitch do the best? It’s simple, she doesn’t take anyone’s crap. No one’s! In fact, she dares people to cross her, and that my friends is why she ruled the hallway.
We all think we will grow up and high school will go away, but that’s not true either. It follows you. The biggest bitch in the hallway becomes the biggest bitch in your office. She’s the one who gets promoted despite the fact that her work is inferior to yours. Why? Because even your boss won’t dare to cross her.
My husband once told me that the person who holds the power in a relationship is the one who shows the least amount of love. At the time, he was young, recovering from a divorce, and I thought he was wrong to think such a thing. Twenty years later, I get it, even at home you can’t be that sweet young girl.
image courtesy of stupendousmarriage.com
The problem is, the sweeter you are, the more people think they can take advantage of you. Help someone in a pinch, they start getting pinched more and more!
About a year ago, I was to the point that I felt like all people did was walk all over me. The more I tried to be supportive and helpful, the more I felt stabbed in the back! So, I found myself thinking back to that conversation years and years ago when my husband let me in on his little secret. At the time, we were barely dating and he was speaking of his ex-wife, but once I realized I could use his own advice against him, there was no turning back.
I had to learn how to choke back my tears. “Never let ’em see you sweat!” I had to learn that too. Sadly, it has worked. The meaner I am to my husband, the nicer he has become towards me. I reject him, he chases me. He sends me a text that says “I love you” and I text back, “Ok :)”, and he comes home with flowers.
Sure, I love being called beautiful ten times a day and I love that he suddenly admits that he couldn’t live without me, but why did I have to become the bigger bitch?
It’s not really my style to be so cold, but it’s true-
Hide your love, and everyone will work to find it. Show it freely, and no one will ever want to see.
The same does not hold true for cleavage, hide it and people forget you’ve got it. Show it, never buy your own drink again!